A Loaf of Bread and White Hyacinths For the Soul

I have been going through old documents, scribbles, on my computer. In the midst of some rambling I found this, which I don't think I wrote, but I can't figure out who wrote it. It's a list of some sort...some lines sound like me and some don't. Whoever wrote it was incredibly clear-minded and definitive. Was it me?

I never act naturally, never stop observing myself. You can’t make rational decisions when you have the flu. Many humble people actually crave the limelight. Having read Ulysses gives you an overall advantage in life. There should be a higher premium on funny than beautiful. My synapses are firing more slowly than they used to. There is enough room in coach class. Women with large breasts have it easier. We form some opinions on politics that are untainted by the media. Lie only to people you don’t like. Don’t worry about money: Use your last two cents for a loaf of bread and white hyacinths for the soul. Go outside at least once every day. Never purposely widen the gap between you and Dad. Stop trying to decide which poems you like and just write. Failure in poetry writing is not a high stakes game. I can’t believe how self-absorbed we are. I am not as beautiful as I deserve to be. I go outside at least once a day and ask for my glee to be stemmed. Marry someone boring.

I feel like that line about your last two cents is some old saying. I think it's a paraphrase. But "I ask for my glee to be stemmed" sounds like me.