Newsflash: I Have Policeman’s Heel. Who’s Jealous?
So I thought it would be a good idea to walk from 95th & Fifth to 62nd & Lex last night because it was nice out and I had the time because I now time all my trips with Hopstop so I am not late, I used to be very late always because I'd assume it took no more than 30 minutes to get anywhere and that's a lie. Or so Hopstop will have you believe and p.s. it's right. So it seems I bruised my heel.
I know this because I got home and found a bruise on my heel. I looked up bruised heel on Google and I found that this affliction is sometime's known as "Policeman's Heel," which I find somehow hilarious--for all the obvious reasons--and maybe flattering. For all the obvious reasons. But what I cannot get over is the explanation of Policeman's Heel (which, by the way, I have) on the very clinical-sounding website Sports Injury Clinic (dot net).
What is a bruised heel?
The heel bone (calcaneus) is protected by a pad of fat. Repeated pounding of the heel can cause the fat pad to be pushed up the side of the heel leaving less of a protective layer causing heel pain. This injury is also sometimes known as Policeman's heel. It is common in sports requiring a lot of impact onto the heel and in particular soldiers marching up and down on the parade square.
What?!?! The parade square? Who wrote this? What copywriter on crack wrote this? Who marches up and down on the parade square?!? I know soliders have a lot of injuries to worry about. I wonder if I should send the Turkish troops some Dr. Scholl's moleskin heel pads.
I didn't intend this to go in this direction but COME ON. Another day, another totally unbelievable news story [via TimesOnline UK]:
The US Administration is opposed to the resolution passed last week by the House of Representatives Foreign Affairs Committee branding as genocide the mass killing of ethnic Armenians in Ottoman Turkey during the First World War.
I mean, it seems so cut and dried. Yes it was genocide. What's the problem? And then I read this:
Those who think this vote is about setting historic facts right aren't paying attention to the present. What we're dealing with isn't some rogue, failed state housing sworn enemies but Turkey, the only Muslim country in NATO, a potential European Union country and the most-important front-line state in the struggle against Islamist extremists. It is the West's leading bridge to and democratic model for the Mideast.
It also is the country through which 90 percent of cargo passes for U.S. and allied troops in Iraq. At the very least, U.S. logistical problems will increase.
Granted the second quote is from an opinion piece on Bloomberg.com.
Definitely should consider sending Dr. Scholl's. Because insult has obviously already been added to injury, so it's really the least I can do. Whose insult, whose injury, I don't know. I'm just a confused private citizen with the heel of a policeman, after all.
Update: I continued reading on Sports Injury Clinic Dot Net and came across this zinger at the end, which is good colorful advice not unworthy of a Sports Injury Clinician Dot Net:
There is no point you stopping running for a week if you put up scaffolding for a living and are on your feet every day.